The Act Of Cowardice According To Ronald B Weasley
by psycho-girl101
Summary: A songfic based on Billy by James Blunt. Ron makes a very difficult choice.


**Ron's Choice**

(Based upon BILLY by James Blunt)

_Billy's leaving today,_

_Don't know where he's going._

It was done. There was no going back now. His battered trunk stood faithfully at his side. Atop was a petite owl cage; inside the cage was an even smaller, insane owl. He hadn't had the heart to leave Pig, the owl, behind in the end. He was already leaving so much. But now was not time to reconsider. He had made his decision and this time he would stand by it. This time. That old, hand-me-down trunk held so much more than his prized possessions. It held memories of a place which would now become a memory itself. The place it had carried his school stuff to for the past six years. Hogwarts. No, now is not the time to think of that either He told himself shaking his head, trying to get rid of the thoughts but not succeeding. Nothing would ever help him to forget. Or forgive.

_Holds his head in disgrace,_

_He can't escape the truth._

_He knows the price that he's paid._

Who was he kidding, it wasn't him who should forgive, it would be them forgiving him. For what he is about to do. He couldn't bare to think of what he was leaving behind but the thoughts just wouldn't leave him alone. The burrow, his childhood, Hogwarts, Hermione.

Oh Hermione, if only he could have told her the truth then maybe thinks would have been different. He could see her smile now, the smile he had hoped would one day be reserved for only him but now that would never happen. He wouldn't be seeing her again. He had the best image of her left though. Just before he left the party they had danced and it had been perfect. He could still smell her perfume, still feel the warmth where her head had rested on his chest. Still remember how perfectly they had fitted together, the looks people had given them as if to say aren't they just right? It wasn't fair that they were being denied that happiness by the horror of real life.

_He admits that it's too late,_

_To admit that he's afraid._

_Tomorrow comes,_

_Sorrow becomes his soul mate._

He didn't know quite where he was going. He only knew it was going to be somewhere far away, somewhere where no one knew his name or who he was. Some where he was free from a label, free from a lifetime of upturned noses and closed doors just because of who he was or had been. He knew this was the cowards way out but what choice did he have? He was a pigeon in a flock of flamingos, a nobody smothered by somebody's. And he was tired of it. Tired of having to prove himself day after day. Where ever he ended up now people could like him for who he was, not throw him aside because of what he wasn't.

_The damage is done,_

_The prodical son is too late._

_Oh, doors close,_

_But he's always open._

How long had he been standing there? He didn't have a clue but if he stayed too long people may even come looking for him. That is if they thought of him as important enough to need found. It was a sad fact that nobody honestly cared for him or his opinion. He had never told anyone his real thoughts because if he had truly told them then he would have been rejected by his friends and disowned by family. Because the honest truth was, he was frightened and thought this whole war ludicrous. He hated himself for it but how could people seriously put all their hopes on one 17 year old?

_To relieve time,_

_In his mind. Oh Billy._

_Billy's leaving tonight,_

_Don't know where he's going._

He could hear music drifting on the summer breeze. There was the tinkle of laughter. The wedding had been so beautiful. Bill had never been more happy and Fleur, she had looked as radiant as ever. It was kind of strange really. He was the sixth of seven children and yet he was eighth. Harry came before him, or that's what it seemed like._  
_

_He's got lines on his face,_

_They tell a story of his pain._

_He accepts it's his fate,_

_He admits he took too long,_

_To admit that he was wrong._

Harry was everything Molly and Arthur could wanted him to be. He had the looks, the brains, the bravery and the skill where as Ron was gangly, stupid and a clumsy coward. Fred and George were funny, Ginny was brave, Bill was wise, Charlie was exciting even Percy was clever but he just didn't quite have enough. His brothers and Harry had always had what he wanted. Quidditch Team Captain, Head Boy or the girl he secretly wanted. No he was eighth best in every category that mattered.

_Tomorrow comes,_

_Sorrow becomes his soul mate._

_The damage is done,_

_The prodical son is too late._

_Oh, doors close,_

_But he's always open._

_To relieve time,_

_In his mind. Oh Billy._

He didn't have time to be standing here. Not now people would soon begin to wonder where he was. Yes, there was the rhythmic tinkling of spoon on glass. The cue for silence, the cue for speeches. He heard someone clear their throat and begin. He was meant to be next. He had had a talk prepared all about the values of friends and family and how you should stand by each other no matter what. Through thick and thin. For a moment he was over come with a feeling of bitter resentment. For himself. For life. For the person who had driven him to take such drastic action. Harry Potter. If Harry had tried harder then who knows but he didn't and now it was too late.

_Tomorrow comes,_

_Sorrow becomes his soul mate._

_The damage is done,_

_The prodical son is too late._

_Oh, doors close,_

_But he's always open._

_To relieve time,_

_In his mind. Oh Billy._

He couldn't hang around forever, waiting for someone to listen or understand. Harry had saved so many but he couldn't save Ron. His best friend. One of the only people who truly understood him. But Harry had never taken the time to understand Ron. And that was why he was leaving, forever.

_Oh Billy._


End file.
